Gyms: Fashion shows or Fitness centers?

There's a running stereotype about gyms:  People go to preen and show off their hot bods and pick up other hot people.  Gyms are often used as a sexual networking site, whether it's the generation of turquoise spandex or see-through Lululemon yoga pants.  And it kind of makes sense....you see how much stamina someone has, what they look like sweaty, and just how flexible they are.  But anyway!  That sort of thing does nothing for me (and hi, I'm married), and I'm sure many other people feel the same way.

I chose my gym because it's independently owned, right around the corner, and 24/7.  I was very lucky to be paired with my trainer.  We've said for years what a serendipitous match we are.  When I go there on my own, I never feel like anybody's staring.  There are many cute men and women that attend my gym, and no one really interacts much unless they're over by the free weights.  I love that no one pays much attention!  You can just go there in mismatched baggy or tight workout clothes (as long as they're clean and decent), and do your moves without worrying about judgment. 

I have worn quite the random ensembles, and lately I've realized that I need to wear tank tops if I'm going to be doing cardio.  I hate the feeling of excess material covering my upper body as I sweat.  This means that I need to have enough confidence to show off my arms and belly.  Normally, I don't care about my arms, and I wear my wide tanks that I bought years ago.  Today?  I grabbed the first thing from my drawer, felt how the tank clung to every ripple, looked in the mirror, and shrugged.  I bundled up in my peacoat, ran out in the 30-something degree weather, and let the jiggle fly on the treadmill.  

When I looked in the mirror after my workout, I felt accomplished as always.  I know I still have a spare tire that's ever so slowly deflating, but the trimming has begun.  I don't care if there's anyone there who is grossed out or offended by my confidence.  I wouldn't run around in public without a coat or hoodie in this top at this point in my life, but I feel like my work is starting to show.  I'm happy to be in a gym that emphasizes personal growth and strength and not just aesthetics.  

You don't know how hard it is to take a selfie of your back.  But I'm just so proud of how it's been shaping and looking less flat and wide!  And I'll admit it, I love showing off my tats.

And then I turn around.  And the flat illusion is gone.  HA!  Hey, if I can jog in front of people in this clingy tank, then I can post this picture.  MOTIVATION.

But now the collarbone is slowly emerging as I smile, so no complaints!  My upper half always shrinks faster than the middle.  And let me tell you-  this is the most narrow the middle has been in more than 10 years!  

I never thought I'd be posting sloppy post-workout pictures of myself on the internet.  It's actually very freeing!  My gym has been very supportive of me and even posted the picture of me with the potatoes on their Facebook page.  I may not be one of the traditionally toned and sexy people, but I feel good knowing that they accept and encourage everyone in their individual goals.  It's ok to be sloppy while working towards long term goals and self confidence.  Anyone who just sees the outside isn't worth knowing anyway.  

Motivation...ooh, something shiny!

It used to be like pulling teeth to get me changed and out the door to the gym.  It's close to my house, but once I get home from work, all I want to do is get in PJs and crash with dinner in my Sheldon Cooper sofa spot.  Yet, if I don't get my butt out the door, I will be a lump for the rest of the night.

I have found over the years that bright bold colors motivate me, which is kind of hilarious considering my wardrobe has been 75% black over the past 15 years.  I immediately decorated my desk at work to keep myself relaxed and happy.

Notice the bright turquoise, hot and raspberry pinks, sharp graphics, and my Game of Thrones house sigil prominently displayed despite color clashing.  

I realized that I needed to have some fun accessories to get my butt up and out.  I have so many leftover t-shirts, tanks, and yoga pants/capris that I don't need to buy much cute clothing that will just get smelly.  However, when I was in the market for a new sports bra, I decided to get the one that made me feel good despite no one seeing anything besides slipped straps.

Old Navy special

My Fitbit Zip is hot pink.  Of course.  I clip it right on the front of my bra after I get dressed and take it off right before I go to bed.  Bluetooth and apps sync everything.  Technology is so freakin cool when it comes to tracking!  I'm one of those people who will buy a planner at the beginning of the year and get all excited about being super organized and ON TOP OF MY LIFE.  It usually would be abandoned by January 20.  I definitely need something that does all the meticulous tracking for me!  

Surprise, neon!

The tap water in this area is gross (so hard, not even a filter helps!), and I feel guilty loading up on individual bottles of Smart Water all the time.  I went back to buying gallons of water for home, and I've finally found a way to drink tap water without grimacing:  A neon purple tumbler!  I can't see what's in the cup, and I just grab and sip while jogging.  When you're sweating, you don't care what the hell you're drinking.  It's a hell of a lot easier than tossing your head back while drinking from a bottle.  

20 ounces of awesome elusiveness

Music is an absolute must while I'm on the move.  I loaded up my iPhone with a gym playlist and try not to listen to the songs much outside of the gym.  It makes them more special this way.  Naturally, I couldn't pass up these earbuds.

Pink and teal owls.  Were the manufacturers walking around in my brain?

I also enjoy my Lannister lion earbuds, but the sound quality isn't as good.

I have really diverse taste in music and rearrange my playlist quite a bit.  Right now, these are the tunes that keep my legs moving.

I just added the last four tonight.  I just hope I don't bust into Stephen Colbert's Daft Punk moves on the treadmill!

 We've......come too far......to give up...who we areeeeeeee........

Ahem.

I've noticed as I've been losing weight that I've been integrating more color into my wardrobe.  I should never have been afraid to be bold and vibrant, but now I'm finally starting to feel like brightness is peeking back into my self esteem.  That's the best motivation of all.

New Year's Relief!

One of the more stressful parts of starting a new year is getting on the scale for the first time.  I weigh myself every Monday morning before getting in the shower and eating or drinking.  Sometimes I also do it on Tuesday morning to compare digits if I had a high sodium weekend.  I text my trainer on Monday, and if it's a weird number, I tell her that I'll officially "call it" on Tuesday.

New Years 2014 was filled with pretty rich food, courtesy of our wonderful hosts, their new kitchen, and their passion for cooking.  I already told my trainer during my final workout of the year that I will eat as simply as possible beforehand because you cannot keep my from my friend's gourmet bacon cheeseburgers! (No, seriously, his cooking is art.)  I might have had some wine and appetizers and a butt ton of cool ranch Doritos as well.  I may have also turned on the movie Rent two nights later, finished the last half of the wine bottle, and indulged in an entire bag of reduced fat Trader Joe's potato chips with my husband from 9 pm-1 am.  It's not something I do often since I hardly imbibe, but it was fun as hell, and I'm glad I got it out of my system.

Naturally, there were inconveniently timed evening appointments, snowy icy weather, and a general PFFT attitude to going to the gym from this past Thursday-Saturday.  Rather than dusting off my stationary bike (never said I wasn't lazy), I just focused on what I ate and drank a lot of water.  I went to the gym on Sunday morning when everything was a sheet of ice.  I'd say that's dedication!  My joints felt infinitely better after I did my 1.25 mile jog.  I can't wait to get back there tonight.  It's what my trainer calls a "positive addiction."

The moment of truth was at 8 am this morning....I braced myself as I stepped on the scale....still 41 pounds down.  Hallelujah!

I'm SO ready to kick 2014's ass now!  Let the constant smoothies, jogging, strength work, and body shaping begin!

You say po-ta-to, I say VICTORY!

My husband loaded 8 bags of potatoes in my arms, which is the equivalent of the weight I lost in 2013.

Holy. hell.

No wonder I was so tired all the time.  No wonder I didn't want to drag my butt off the sofa to do housework, let alone exercise. My Fitbit Zip opened my eyes to the fact that I have a very sedentary office job. I know that job added an extra bag and a half of potatoes in the last half of 2012.  

I know people in the produce department probably thought we were nuts, but I don't care. I should have run laps around the store in the manner of a Biggest Loser challenge.

Tangible evidence of weight loss feels amazing. If you've had any eye opening moments like this, I'd love to hear about them!

Reshaping My Life

I always said that I didn't want to document my weight loss journey in public, but the support I've received on Facebook has been fantastic.  I even have people asking me what my "secret" is.  I don't ever presume to be an expert on weight loss and exercise and whatnot, especially as everybody's body and life is different.  What works for me may not work for you.  However, I love reading success stories on blogs and message boards and even got the nerve up to make a post on MyFitnessPal, the website and app that has assisted me in my focus.  The support and compliments were overwhelming, and I felt great.

I'd like to start this blog to hold myself accountable and to keep my eye on the 50 pound prize this year.  I lost 41 pounds in 2013, so I want to raise the goal a bit.  I won't beat myself up if I don't hit that goal exactly, as I know there are plenty of Non Scale Victories (NSV) out there that are just as exciting.  Normally, I wouldn't post public pictures of myself, but I don't plan on getting incredibly personal on here, and I'm not sharing pictures of family or friends.  If someone I know who's not actively in my life or on Facebook sees this, big deal.  This is a POSITIVE journey and not something to be ashamed of!

I found this sign over the summer and really regret not buying it.

I had a hard time coming up with a name for this blog, but I figured I'd name it after the two things I never thought I'd love so much.  Now that I've been losing so many pounds and inches, I've been getting cold all the time.  I used to have a fan on at my desk 365 days a year.  I welcome snuggling in sweaters now, and that is a huge change for me.  I also used to turn my nose up at green/fruit protein smoothies.  Now I don't feel right if I don't have one at least 5 mornings a week.  I have opened my mind to drinking spinach and banana (among many other yummy ingredients), and that has helped my skin, energy, and I know I'm getting at least one totally "clean" meal per day.

My weight has fluctuated my whole life, especially in 1999 when I was a freshman in college, got my first job, and had my first heartbreak.  I also took care of chronically ill parents, and that sure didn't help!  I gained 100 pounds by 2008, and I went on Weight Watchers in 2009.  I swiftly lost 45 pounds just with diet, but it came back almost as quickly as it left.  By my wedding in April 2012, I had gained all the weight back.  By my friend's wedding in July 2012, I added an extra 7 pounds.  I was at the highest number of my life, and I was in denial for a few months.  By December, I knew I had to take action for 2013.

I've slowly changed my habits with food, and as the weight dropped, I started adding exercise.  I went from the girl who got winded easily to (slowly) jogging 2 miles straight by October.  I don't deprive myself, and I'm still fully learning moderation.  I feel like I'm losing the weight really slowly, but at the same time, I know that I'll keep it off longer.  I need to make this a lifestyle change.  I've had a trainer for years, and she's been absolutely amazing.  I give her my food diary from MyFitnessPal to go over every week and she tells me the adjustments I need to make.  She gives me positive reinforcement but doesn't take it easy on me since she knows what I'm capable of physically.  She said while I do cardio on my time that she will shape me during our weekly session.  I'm supposed to start planking along with pushups and leg kicks on the exercise ball a couple times a week on my own.

If this blog can be motivational for anyone, awesome.  I'm going to definitely update it once a month with progress pictures, and I intend on sharing tidbits, stories, food and activity I like, and where I'm currently at in the journey.  And trust me, it's not always going to be sunny positive!  I still get very frustrated and I'm still getting used to what I see in the mirror.  I think 2014 will be a more physical year since my body has shed the equivalent of 8 bags of potatoes and is building more strength and cardio ability.

Let's start with the January 2014 pictures!  I plan on wearing the same outfit every time.  It's my 4 year old overly worn and washed favorite Old Navy shirt (2X) and my amazing Torrid flare jeans that really do favors for a pear shaped girl (20).  The jeans I started at last year (same style) were 24.  I'm pulling these current jeans on and off without having to unbutton or zipper, so I have a feeling I'll be getting a new pair by April when they're hiked up to my chest.

 

I'm 5'4", and I'll share my weight numbers after I reach "onederland."

Right now, I'd like to share "2012 before" and "2013 during" pictures so you can see my progress.  Click the link for pictures galore!  This is also for me to have a visual source of progress when I feel frustrated.